Going to a little Southern Baptist college in the 80’s located in the buckle of the Bible belt presented some interesting situations. None more interesting than Richard.
Richard was what we called a “scripture-spouter”. Regardless of what was being discussed or what was being said, whenever Richard involved himself in the conversation, he always quoted Scripture – King James Version no less.
Conversations with Richard sounded a little like this:
PERSON A: “Richard, how’s it going?”
RICHARD: “Oh, I’ve had a rough day… but like the Bible says, ‘all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.'”
PERSON A: “Well man, I hope things get better for you”
RICHARD: “Whether it does or not, ‘This is the day which the LORD hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.'”
So that’s the way it was with Richard. He was pretty harmless, but at the same time pretty obnoxious. The frustration was that you could never get him to have a normal conversation about anything… he always used Scripture references.
One day, it became very clear that Richard was in a league by himself.
While gathering for the start of class one day, we were all sitting around talking about stuff, and Richard walks in sporting a brand new haircut. One of the girls in the class said, “Hey Richard, nice haircut.”
To which Richard replied (in his strong southern accent and always pious attitude), “Whatcha see is Jesus!”
And at that point, in unison, everyone that witnessed it laughed our asses off. To this day that story lives on in infamy as one of my favorite Stupid Church People moments of all time. For years it’s been an inside joke. Now I hope to share it with you, my friends, as something we can share together.
I regret laughing at Richard that day and not gently trying to lead him to a better way. But I myself was lost and couldn’t completely see how blind my eyes were to my own SCPness. Today I am a different man.
Here at SCP, we are making the world a better place by seeking to save one Stupid Church Person at a time.
Leave no Richard behind.